City Girl Meets Country World: March 2011

It happened today, it certainly wasn't the first and I know it won't be the last.. Today on my way to Taco Cabana to get a Cabana bowl, I got the big birdie. I was driving in the left hand lane minding my own business. I noticed a car beside me and a car behind me. I was going a little faster than the car next to me so I pass him and then I approach the traffic light as it turns red and stop. The lady behind me is in the right lane now and she stops a little in front of me in the right lane. The next thing I know I hear a loud honking from her and she sticks her hand out the window and sticks her ugly finger out the window and leaves it there for what seems like an eternity - the vile and repulsive thing it was. I turned to look to my left and right to see if there was someone else she was flipping off, but there was no other cars around. So I'm left thinking what the heck did I do? So, I honk back at her. I know I shouldn't have done that.. but I was still confused at what I possibly could have done. So she again decides she was going to flip me off again because apparently I didn't see it enough the first time!! She turns right and I continue on my way.. I left the intersection feeling angry, confused, and then it culiminated in sadness and pity. Even when someone cuts me off and does something worthy of "the bird" I still don't give the bird. I just mutter something to myself like, "you jerk" or "thank you so much for that" as I try to keep my cool.

I just felt sorry for her because it's just so sad to live life with such a hatred and such anger. Why do we feel we have to be this way to each other? Did that possibly make her feel better?? I wish I could have followed her and see how the rest of her day went.. I wonder if the bad Karma reared its ugly hand at her and then slapped her in the face.. and caused her stuff that ugly finger back in her mouth. Unfortunately, I'll never know.. But now I reflect at that beastly gesture and just say, "Wow, I thought I had road rage!"

This is actually a good lesson for me.. When I start to feel that road rage coming on when a driver makes a dumb mistake, I just need to laugh it off and remember how it made me feel when someone did that to me.. and how by doing it I became someone I did not like much at all.

Here is a song that makes me smile.

So I'm back from Israel - what an experience!! Although I'm back in body, I don't think I'm quite all there in my spirit. I think I left a piece of my heart there. It's an amazing experience to go and walk where Jesus walked and to see the country where it all began. As I reflect on all that I saw, I feel joy beyond measure but also a tiny bit of sadness as well. Israel is a fascinating country and yes it is true that once you go there, the scriptures become alive. But I am afraid now that I am back that it will start to slip away sooner than I want it to - the memories, the feeling, the emotions, the beauty. I am afraid to forget this feeling as I experienced a peace like no other. As I go back to my life here in the states, I find myself disappointed and sad. I know God has not left me and He is still just a whisper away, but somehow He seemed more real in Israel. Everything here seems so meaningless and insignificant...It's like once you have been so high, it's hard to come back down from the mountain.
One thing that was really special to me was the Jerusalem Cross. It looks like this.

When we were in Bethleham at the church of the nativity, the guide told us about this cross and how it represents the five wounds on Jesus' body. Up until that point on the trip, I had not really felt God was speaking to me much at all. I was listening, but I was not getting a message from Him. When I heard the meaning of this cross, I was moved and felt like I was touched by the holy spirit. Later on we went to shop at this place that sold jewelry and souveniers from Bethleham. I found a pretty ring with the cross of jerusalem and I had to have it. It was a very unique ring and the cross was encased in a thin glass and the setting was raised as one you would see in a diamond/wedding ring. I was showing off the ring because I loved it so much and one of the employees of the store said, "Hey, that is a nice ring, it looks almost like a compass." I said, "Wow, you are right. Too bad it's not a real compass because I am always getting lost." After the conversation was over I contemplated the beautiful metaphor of the jerusalem cross. God was using this man in the store to show me how He was like a compass for my life, and when I got lost and forgot who I was.. which I often do, all I needed to do was look at the cross and I would find my way once again. This is true of the Christian life. I often get caught up in things of this life and I am disgusted at myself for letting it get me down time and time again. I know it's only human, but we as Christians are called to be set apart in this world. Often times I am saddened that we do not do a good job at being set apart and instead are the ones who are condeming and using Jesus' name to do this. Just like Pastor Mark said that the Christians can't get along with each other and for that reason we do not have the keys to the church of the nativity. One of the most sacred place for Christians! This is indeed a tragedy. I pray that Christians would wake up and realize that the more they try to convince others that they are right, the further away from the gospel and from the Lord that person gets. Love does not work that way. I pray that I will never forget what I learned in Israel, although I know that it is a possibility I may momentarily forget. It's a good thing I have my compass to guide me.

Here are some pictures of my amazing experience in Israel.